Goal Realization!!

Alright, after a bit of deliberation on the fitness goal thingy I have come to a conclusion.  And it is one that will be challenging but I will enjoy the challenge of. 

I will do yoga for 100 days continuously!

I have decided this for 2 reasons.  One: I am always telling people the story of when I did Denise Austen's "21 Days to a yoga body" DVD for 21 days, because I wanted to prove this blonde perky chick wrong...to my chagrin, I felt soooooo wonderful after 21 days.  People were telling me how great I looked even though I hadn't dropped a pound.  I could jump, skip, dance around, my body felt new and strong.  But, as perusual, I quit after 21 days and my body went back its normal floppy, slouchy postured state.  Now I just go around telling people about the healing qualities of yoga...then I always pause and ask myself, "Self, why aren't you doing yoga?  You love it.  You know it works.  It gave you the body you wanted, the body you still crave.  Why am I not doing yoga!?"  Now I will do it.

Number dos:  100 is officially the magic number.  I am going to engrain into my very being this number.  I will give 100 percent at this goal.  I will allow myself to spend $100 if I complete this goal.  I have just celebrated my 100th day of not smoking and am charging on for 100 more.  I want to live to be 100.  All this to further convince myself that I WILL LOSE 100 lbs!  It will happen, if for no other reason then 100 is the magic number.  (Sometimes when I throw in a bit of magic I respond better to things.)

SO, that being said and explained and laid out for one and all to see...

I will begin my 100 Days to a Yoga Body challenge...Denise would be so proud.

Now to prepare for the challenge...

New Fitness Goal

I have been wondering aimlessly in the land of the workout world with its scary machines and fear of shin splints.  I attempted to run until the splints attacked and I figured losing weight before learning to run would be a better idea for my body as a whole.  My shins danced with glee at this realization and then promptly stopped due to the pain.

What next?  The question has been plaguing me for some time and I feel off track without a workout goal of some kind. 

But TODAY I decided that a fitness goal doesn't have to be something that I have never done before or something so challenging that it makes me want to die (as running did).  I am simply going to do Yoga!

Now I know I need to be more specific about this goal, so let's narrow it down a bit shall we.  Could I see myself doing yoga 5 times a week?...hmmmmmmmm....

It's a Beautiful Day in the Grrrrrrrr!

What should have been a most relaxing, enjoyable day was interrupted by my own self loathing.  There I was on the first cool day of season.  Autumn fragranced the breeze and the sun shone in the clear blue sky.  I found myself lounging on a blanket in Forest Park, a pond in my field of vision, enough shade to keep the temp down, and Oscar Wilde enlightening me with his wit and charm.  So content feeling and proud that I chose to come the park so that I could couple my study time with my workout time.  For I had to hike quite a ways to find THE perfect spot to read "The Importance of Being Earnest".  With literature atmosphere is everything!  And when I grew tired of lounging I could stroll through the Art Museum or down the bike path.  "Look at me" I thought "being an active person."  My usual activity consists of walking to the bathroom so this was a dream come true.  I was being THAT chick.  The active chick that I see or hear about who bikes through parks, visits museums, and does not carry a bit of food or cigarettes with her.  She is free of such desires, activity is her stimuli!  *sigh* 

I sat for an hour.  Then I left.

I had gone all that way and there has never been such a beautiful day.  My body!  It couldn't handle it.  For once it wasn't my self conscious internal dialogue that sent me scurrying from something I enjoy.  I was even fine with flopping around on the blanket like a fat fish expelled from the pond.  My feet ached horribly, my butt and thighs were sore from sitting on the ground, my neck and back shot with pain from my atroscious posture.  I desperately wanted to stay.  I wanted to go for a jog, rent a bike, and use a row boat for the first time.  I wanted to tramp around the park watching the people and dipping my feet into the various cool fountains about the place.  I wanted to explore areas of the park I have never seen before, and possibly find new spots to relax and study at.  But no.  I am trapped, trapped in this fat suit of nastiness with not even an ounce of muscle to hold up my heavy belly while I sit on the ground to read. 

This is too much.  I can't even do the things that make me happy and feel fit?!  Grrrrrrrrrrr, etc.  The whole "pleasurable" experience was so tiring, I felt like an old lady all stiff and limpy on my way back to the car.  The fitter people of the world jogging, biking, strolling hand in hand past me made me envious of those seemingly simple pleasures others experience with ease.

In essence, I was debbiedowner while beauty, happiness, and flippin tweeting birds were abundant.  So I threw up my hands and porked out on greek food, chocolate, AND whatever I could find lying about the house.  How do I stop this behavior?  Lord, I need the strength to break through these addictions and these horrible behavoirs.

I need to do more yoga!!!

Afternoon Freak Outs

So what is about this time of the day when all my failures future and past come crashing down on my head?!  Maybe I have too much time to think at a job where I sit at a computer all day.  When I begin to make mental plans to feel better i.e. exercise, healthy dinner plans, aromatherapy, prayer...BAM! up comes the wall.  I can't think passed it.  It blocks all rational healthy thought or action.  Every fat cell in me screams "take action!  move!  make a change!" (in a choir of helium voices, of course).  But BAM! I hit my head on the wall of Stubborness?  Slothiness?  Insecurity?  What is this thing and would a lobotomy help?

Hurrah! for a stronger will

In time, this ginger will rejoice with the glorious "HURRAH!" that follows 100 lbs weight loss.  No longer will I shout the dreaded failure's cry of "Oy!" that follows a defeated weigh in.  I will be stronger physically, emotionally, and spiritually.  My body will be yogified, runnerfied, and danceified!  I will be grateful of the body the good Lord gave me and for once will treat it as the gift that it is.  I will no longer consume as if I were a black hole sucking in all things and never giving back.  One day I will stop wondering what other people think about if not food or drink.  I will prove to my neices that your goals can be reached and a healthy lifestyle is possible.  I will finally be released from my addictions to food, drink, and cigarettes.  Some beautiful glorious day i will be free!!!